Wednesday, July 3, 2013
Los Locos Burritos Grande
I have a story to tell about this. I was in the Goodwill store, shopping around. I happened to be by the bathing suits. I was looking through them to see if there were any my size. This tall muscular looking Mexican guy with tattoos, drooping black mustache, cap on backwards and a face like he hated the world, came over and stood beside me ..
I thought .. ieeeee ieeeee ieeeeee I'm eeeen beeeeg trrrouble. .. so i held this bathing suit .. luminous yellow I think .. across my hips and smiled at him and asked if the thought it was big enough.
He looked at me for a second and a friendly smile lit up his face. "I don't know sir but they got almost every size. That one's kinda gay if you know what I mean."
Very conversational .. that's good.
So I said yeah .. "I need something more macho!!! y grande" (in my limited Spanish that said 'and beaggar')
He grinned and made some some male bonding remark like "yeah we don't wanna start dressing in yellow!!!" .. and I came back with .. "besides ... I need something to hold big cajones!!!" (Spanish for huevos) .. He broke out laughing and moved away from the idiot Canadian. .. ..
Later as I was going through the till he came up behind me. "oh oh maybe I am in trouble" says my inner old man tourist mind.
When I got to put my stuff on the counter .. Rico .. that was his name .. says .. "Hey Maria .. hombre ees okay .. geeve it to heem for free." Then he whispers to me " es mi hermana." (she is my sister.) so I got to steal a "black" bathing suit from Goodwill with collusion from the clerk and her gang banger hermano. (brother)..
And that's how I started my life as a member of "Los Locos Burritos Grande" " LLBG" I get my tattoo (LLBG one inch by 5 inches on my left butt cheek) when I can do a wheelie on my moped.
But seriously .. most of this story is true (the part about me being in their gang is not.. I failed the physical ... and the language test) . I am very impressed by the Latinos I met in Arizona .. on average they seem to be very good folks who love their families.